A Journey of Discovery: Living as an assistant in L’Arche
In 1992, the magazine 'Christian' asked if someone from the L'Arche community would write about their understanding of "Church". This is what Maggie Smith, a long-term member of L'Arche Kent, wrote.
I have recently returned from a gathering of assistants in their first year at L'Arche. Some were young, spending a year after school, college or university; others were older, exploring new life options. They were a very diverse group, coming from many countries, belonging to different church denominations; some with no specific religious affiliation. What was obvious was that, although they came from such different backgrounds, they were quite profoundly united by what they had been living during this year.
They had each decided to spend a year or more at L’Arche, a community of people who have learning disabilities. They had come to share their lives, to live in community, not simply to help, but to share life together in a relationship of mutual enrichment. It is a community that tries to live in a spirit that says each individual, whether handicapped or not, has a gift to give and that each person is of unique and mysterious value.
People with learning disabilities are often regarded as a source of sorrow and pain. In our society someone who can't learn to read, write or cross the road, who can't climb the ladder of self sufficiency; is almost an affront. They tug at the very foundation of our accepted values, and the things we pursue and strive alter. And yet Jesus said, “in as much as you welcome the least of my brothers and sisters you welcome me” Mt 25, Lk 9). It is from this reality of welcoming the person who is weak in the eyes of the world that L'Arche derives its deepest Christian identity.
Whatever your particular way of understanding life with your head, the reality of the person who is in front of you demands that you live and practice the values you hold.
To become an assistant at L'Arche is to enter a very ordinary reality of home, work and community. The days are very simple; getting up, helping people to dress, breakfast, work in the craft workshop, garden or therapy project, home for tea, supper and prayers. A life full of all the usual rounds; a friend's birthday, going to the cinema, visiting friends, welcoming friends, going shopping, going to Church and each other's Churches; and yet, it is a reality that is quite transforming. I wait for the minibus taking me into work and as it draws up Alec, Pete and Yvonne greet me with such warmth you wouldn’t think it was only yesterday we saw each other. As we get out Alec shouts after me every morning “Don't work too hard”. Sometimes each morning can feel like a celebration of the sheer fact of being alive and on this earth together.
Work is more serious (contrary to Alec's injunction). We sell what we make on its own worth, not as an object of another's charity. It is very important for someone used to being put aside to see that what they make has value, people pay money to buy it. Back home we share the cooking. Supper, the important meal of the day is not just a time to eat, but a time to relax together, catch up on each other's day. “To love someone is to waste time with them”, says Jean Vanier who founded L’Arche. It is so important to “waste” time, simply to enjoy the gift of the person. After supper, for those who wish, there is prayer, a short time starting with the Our Father, a reading chosen from scripture, and then a time of silence and free prayer. Peter at his birthday party gave thanks for each person in the room. It's not something we say much in the day to day conversation, but in this gentle and tender space people speak to God what is deepest in their hearts and you hear just how much love there is within people.
We are an ecumenical community, belonging to different denominations, belonging to our own parishes, and taking part in each other's parishes. We pray together simply each day and celebrate as a community the feasts of the year. To be an Inter-denominational community gives a richness and a fullness, and we discover this as a gift and a blessing. We discover too how the person who is weak calls together people who are very different, and calls them to unity.
For people to live together peacefully is perhaps a never ending human task, demanding hard work, and time. Discord is often the quicker, easier solution. We need to learn how to communicate, to work through difficulties with each other, to take responsibility for ourselves and make clear and free choices.
Last week we came together to celebrate the people who had lived this last year with us and were now moving on to other things, to give thanks for what they had given us. People with learning disabilities and a growing number of assistants choose to stay put in our community here in Kent. Each year we are joined by others who wish to discover community life and people with learning disabilities. Each person speaks of what they have received this year, of learning new values, values that have changed their lives. “I felt accepted for who I am, not how I appear”.
They have discovered that in sharing their lives with people who have learning disabilities, sharing in a way that lets the other person give to them, sharing in a way that learns to welcome weakness as a source of life rather than a source of shame, that something quite radical has happened. In a very deep sense people have learned what it is to belong to each other and to form a body that has the mystery of Jesus hidden within it and within the hearts of each of us. If Church means anything, it is this discovery that we are called together, each with our own gift and our own weakness, called to share life and let God transform us into a body where the weakest part is most honoured and is indispensable to the whole (1 Cor 12).
